Parody: Nothing serious here.

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Jtjorden
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Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Jtjorden »

This is a parody. It is not meant to create controversy or hurt feelings.

Canon: Si quis negaverit in iustificatione peccatoris Deum solum esse causam efficientem, Christum solum causam meritoriam, fidem solam causam instrumentalem, qua iustitia Christi suscipitur; atque opera excludi oportere, ne sint causa efficiens, meritoria, aut formalis iustificationis—cum tamen affirmet fidem veram numquam esse sterilem, sed per caritatem operari atque opera bona tamquam fructum suum necessario parere: anathema sit.

Canon: If anyone denies that, in the justification of the sinner, God alone is the efficient cause, Christ alone the meritorious cause, faith alone the instrumental cause by which the righteousness of Christ is received, and that works are excluded as any efficient, meritorious, or formal cause of justification—while nevertheless affirming that true faith is never barren, but necessarily brings forth works through love as its proper fruit: let him be anathema.
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Jtjorden »

Come and see the violence inherent in the system! 😄
(Reminder: this is parody/pastiche—no one is actually being repressed by the anathemas.)
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Doom »

Okay, as I read it, it is a statement of sola fide written in the style of the ecumenical councils defining a dogma?

It is a good pastiche I guess, especially if you wrote it in Latin and then translated it, but I don't think it is actually "funny"
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

I would think that he wrote it in English and then translated into Latin. FWIW, Google translate gave me a slightly different version, so that doesn't look like the tool he used, if he used one.
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Riverboat »

Jtjorden wrote: Tue Feb 24, 2026 2:39 am This is a parody. It is not meant to create controversy or hurt feelings.
Now write it in the style of e.e. cummings.
Why would anyone ever smoke weed when they could just mow a lawn? - Hank Hill
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

if anyone says
that the making-right of a sinner
is not God alone doing
(quietly fiercely entirely)

if anyone says
Christ is not the only worth
the sole because
the deep reason why

if anyone says
faith is not the open hand
the simple receiving
(where Christ’s rightness enters)

if anyone says
that works may sneak in
as cause or credit or shape
of this being-made-just—

yet still insists
that faith may exist
empty
fruitless
loveless—

let him be
no

faith is never barren
it breathes
it moves
it flowers

love happens
works rise
not as roots
but as fruit

and whoever denies this
standing anywhere else
than grace alone

let him be
anathema
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

^ ChatGPT
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Student »

that was awesome. :)

I'm trying to think of a good tune to go with that.
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Highlander »

If any soul gainsay this sacred truth—that in the sinner’s pardon God alone doth work as sovereign cause, that Christ alone by merit wins the grace, that faith alone, the humble instrument, receives His righteousness; and that all works be banish’d from such claim of cause—efficient, meriting, or form—yet still confess that faith, if true, stands never void nor idle, but in love brings forth her fruit in living deeds: let such a one be held accurst, anathema.

...and...

If someone says it ain’t so,
That God don’t do the work alone when a sinner’s set free,
That Christ ain’t the price already paid,
That faith ain’t the hand that takes what mercy made—
If they try to dress it up with deeds and claims,
Sayin’ works got a seat in that holy exchange,
Like they earn it, shape it, or make it real—
They don’t know the truth that the broken feel.

’Cause faith don’t sit like a stone in the rain,
It moves through love like a runaway train,
It bears its fruit though it don’t pretend
To be the root where grace begins.

So if they deny what’s plain to see,
Let ‘em wander far from the liberty—
Call it what you will, but it won’t stand tall,
When the truth rolls down and it judges all.


Same source. In the styles of ....?
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

Kipling?
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

If Works deny – a shadowed Plea –
God’s Cause alone a solemn Hue
Christ’s Merit Faith’s Instrument -
free – And Love, the Fruit – Forever true.

Anathema – then – to such a thought –
A darkness – born of severing’s Pain –
Let Silence be, with lessons brought –
And God’s pure Justice – reign.
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

Now, if you argue, quite insistent, see,
That sinners get their justness – purely, free –
From God alone, you understand,
And Christ’s a bonus, lending a hand.

Faith’s just a tool, a helpful device,
To grab the goodness of that nice Christ’s price –
And work? Forget it! Don’t even try,
It’s utterly useless, passing by.

But if you’re saying, with a thoughtful frown,
That faith’s a bloom, and love comes down,
To sprout and blossom, bright and bold,
Then, frankly, darling, you’re terribly cold!

Anathema’s a word – a little extreme –
For anyone who thinks a sinner’s dream
Is based on logic, neat and tight,
When love's the only real, true light!

Ogden Nash
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

The Sinner’s Justification! Oh, what a fuss!
A complicated problem – it’s quite a plus!
If someone says, ‘It’s God alone, you see,
And Christ’s the hero – happy as can be!’

Faith’s just a gizmo, a clickety-clock,
To grab the goodness – ‘round the block!
A wibbly-wobbly, whirly-whirl thing,
That makes the rightness sweetly sing!

And Works? Don’t bother, don’t you try,
They just go spluttering – way up high!
Like bubbles bursting, pink and blue,
A silly effort – nothing true!

But wait! A bloom! A blossom bright!
Faith’s love explodes with joyous light!
A fruity feeling, sweet and new,
Like blueberry pie, just for you!

It spills and tumbles, giggles free,
A happy, helpful mystery!
A splash of kindness, shining bold,
A treasure story to be told!

Anathema! Oh, that’s a word!
A grumpy frown, a disapproving bird!
It squawks and caws with a prickly plea,
‘Don’t you believe in happy glee!’

Let’s skip that nonsense, silly and slow,
And celebrate the love that helps us grow!
With laughter bubbling, bright and free,
A joyful, wondrous destiny!

So let us cheer with happy sound,
For love and faith, the best around!
A perfect mix, a wondrous treat,
A happy, helpful, joyful feat!
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

The question lingers, shadowed deep,
Of justification, secrets keep—
If one should claim, with earnest plea,
That God alone sets sinners free.

And Christ, the Savior, bright and true,
Doth offer grace, a boundless hue,
While Faith, a vessel, humble, mild,
Receives the gift, a sacred child.

Yet whispers rise, a gentle strain,
Of works excluded, lost to vain—
For Love’s own fruit, a blossom bright,
Doth spring from faith, a beacon light.

‘Anathema!’ – a word of scorn,
Too swift a judgment, newly born—
Let wisdom guide the seeking heart,
And seek the truth, a lasting art.

For in the depths of sorrow’s plea,
God’s boundless mercy shines for thee—
A solace deep, a comfort sweet,
Where soul finds rest, and that complete.

Longfellow
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

This is addictive. I'd better stop.
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

Sinner’s defense stands,
God’s will, Christ’s grace, faith’s design,
Works are banished hence.

No cause can be found,
For merit, or form, or might,
Just grace flows freely.

Yet faith knows no void,
Love’s fruit blooms, a vibrant stream,
Darkness cannot stay.

If you claim this view,
Anathema’s words descend,
Judgment waits for you.


----------------------------------------------------------

There once was a soul in despair,
Whose justification was rare.
God's will was the key,
Christ’s grace set it free,
And works quite simply weren't there.

Faith, as a tool, played its part,
Receiving Christ's grace, as an art.
No merit to claim,
Or effort’s bright flame,
Just grace, for a beautiful start.

But faith never sleeps, as you see,
Love’s fruits bloom in eternity.
A stream, rich and bright,
Banishing the dark night,
A holy effect, truly free.

If you argue this claim with glee,
“Just faith and God’s grace, you agree!”
Anathema’s decree,
“You’ll find no release, see?”
Judgment awaits, eternally.

--------------------------------------------------

When men deny the grace of God’s decree,
And claim the sinner’s cause by Christ alone,
With faith’s mere instrument, a tool to see,
And cast aside the works, a fruitless stone.

Yet faith doth never barrenly reside,
But springs forth love, a fruitful blossom bright,
A radiant stream where grace doth gently glide,
Dispelling shadows with its holy light.

Let none presume to build a justified claim,
Upon a cause that’s not divine and free,
For works exclude themselves from just acclaim,
And leave the soul in utter misery.

So heed this warning, lest your judgment fall,
Anathema’s curse upon your sinful thrall.
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

Send help!
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Obi-Wan Kenobi »

(Sign 1) God’s will, the sinner’s plea, Just grace for you and me!

(Sign 2) Christ’s grace, a worthy plea, Faith’s tool, for all to see.

(Sign 3) No merit, no work, you know, Just faith’s steady flow!

(Sign 4) Faith blooms, love’s sweet delight, Banishing darkness bright!

(Sign 5) If you claim this, understand, Anathema’s hand!

Burma-shave!
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by norwegianblue »

Obi-Wan Kenobi wrote: Wed Mar 04, 2026 5:10 pm Send help!
:| :roll:
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Re: Parody: Nothing serious here.

Post by Highlander »

There is a line from Animal House .... ah, yes ....

Forget it, he's rolling.
Last edited by Highlander on Fri Mar 06, 2026 11:08 am, edited 1 time in total.
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